Sunday, December 6, 2009

I Get Spam...

This has to be one of the funniest so far...
From: Mrs Alyssa Walton

I am the above named person from Iceland. I am married to Hewett Walton who worked with Embassy of Iceland - Ottawa, Canada for Ten years before he died .We were married for years without a child. He died after a brief illness. Before his death we were both born again Christians. Since his death I decided not to re-marry or get a child outside my Matrimonial home which the Bible is against. When my late husband was alive he deposited the sum of 19Million Dollars (Nineteen Million United State Dollars) on the safe deposit Box with the diplomatic vault house.

Presently, this money is still deposited on the safe deposit box with the vault house .Recently; my Doctor told me that have cancer Problem. Though what disturbs me most is my stroke sickness. Having known my condition I decided to donate this Funds better still a Christian individual that will utilize this money the way I am going to instruct here in to fund churches, orphanages and widows propagating the word of God and to ensure that the house of God is maintained. The Bible made us to understand that blessed is the hand that giveth.

I took this decision because I don't have any child that will inherit this money and I don't want my husband's hard earned money to be misused by unbelievers. I don’t want a situation where this money will be used in an ungodly manner. Hence the reason for taking this bold decision. I am not afraid of death hence I know where I am going. I know that I am going to be in the bosom of the Lord. The lord he will fight my case and I shall hold my peace. I don't need any telephone communication in this regard because of my health and because of the presence of my husband's relatives around me always. I don't want them to know about this development.

With God all things are possible As soon as I receive your reply I shall give you the contact of the diplomatic vault house. I will also issue you a letter of authority that will prove you as the original- beneficiary of this Fund. I want you and the church to always pray for me because the lord is my shepherd. My happiness is that I lived a life of a worthy Christian. Whoever that wants to serve the Lord must serve him in spirit and truth. Please always be prayerful all through your life.

Any delay in your reply will give me room in sourcing for a church or Christian individual for this same purpose. Please assure me that you will act accordingly as I stated herein Hoping to hearing from you.

I have set aside 15% for you and for your time and 10% for any expenses if there is any then remaining balance for the word of God.

Remain blessed in the name of the Lord.

Yours in Christ,

Mrs Alyssa Walton
I was seriously thinking about replying and playing this out. I would love to see where it goes. But in the end, I have better uses for my time than to torment and tease an illiterate scam artist. Anyway, it would be cruel to treat someone with stroke sickness and cancer Problem with anything less than my sincere wishes for a swift and dignified demise.

Only in a culture that sanctifies idiocy would something like this flourish.

3 comments:

Unknown said...

Hehehe why would an Icelander working in Canada have 19 million USD?

Lockwood said...

Hadn't even caught that. But the confusion and dumpidity run through this like the Amazon runs through Brazil.

Mule Breath said...

Having had the same email address for 20+ years, I get all sorts of spam. Of course the good old spam filter takes most out, but some get in regardless. This thing you post is just about the poorest attempt at the classic Nigerian Letter I believe I have ever seen.