10 Lies About Me

I have mixed feelings toward memes; sometimes they're on a topic that is of interest to me and sometimes they just look quick and easy. Many times they look as if they're going to be of questionable interest to readers and take a lot of time on my part. Those latter are the ones I ignore. As an example, there's one going around right now on "25 Random things about me." I have never been able to finish reading one of those posts, and I'm certainly not going to write one, so don't bother tagging me with that meme. On the other hand, Greg recently tagged me with "6 Random things:" quick, easy and potentially interesting, and I was happy to play. (oops... Dean tagged me with this one)

I have never started a meme before, and this one is more for my own amusement than anything else. It's kind of a snarky response to the 25 Things meme, but I could tell there was some potential for humor in the idea. If you feel like playing, the rules should be obvious, and I'll be flattered and probably amused. If you don't feel like playing... well, note that I'm not tagging anyone. You're off the hook, but I hope you still enjoy (but don't believe) these 10 Lies About me:

1) I have several secret superpowers, but I use them only for good and to fight evil, never for my own benefit.

2) I have read the entire internet. Several times.

3) Women find me impossibly desirable, and this has caused me no end of problems.

4) I believe that complete and utter butt ignorance is the only way one can be objective and without preconceptions. Thus people with that charcteristic are the ones I want for my most trusted sources of information and for making important policy decisions.

5) I believe that our media have been woefully inadequate in hiring people with the above qualification.

6) I believe the universe was created 31.4159 (10 pi) seconds ago, and all our memories implanted by an omnipotent spaghetti monster.

7) That's why I remember liking pasta, although I have never actually eaten it.

8) When you get right down to it, I find rocks awfully dull. But geology was an easy major that I knew would have me rolling in dough.

9) I think a cheap, easy treatment to remove 25 years or so of my physical age would really suck.

10) I thought this would be a slow, tedious post to put together, but it actually only took a couple of minutes.