Wednesday, March 3, 2010

Bringing Back Reagan's Head

The Republicans want to put Reagan's head on the fifty-dollar bill. I want to know where their priorities are. Recession? Health? Climate change? Nope. St. Ronnie.
"President Reagan is indisputably one of the most transformative presidents of the 20th century," McHenry wrote to his Congressional colleagues. "Like President Roosevelt on the dime and President Kennedy on the half dollar, President Reagan deserves a place of honour on our nation's currency."
Now I agree with McHenry. Reagan was one of the most transformative presidents of the 20th century (though my spell-checker seems to be telling me "transformative" isn't a valid word). With his union busting and deregulation, he set the groundwork to transform the US from a mostly middle-class nation into a mostly struggling-to-get-by nation, with a healthy percentage of not getting by in the mix, and that teeny fraction of a percent that is fabulously, opulently, well-off. "Someday I want to be rich. Some people get so rich they lose all respect for humanity. That's how rich I want to be." (Rita Rudner) With his anti-environmental tilt (remember James Watt? In his Wiki photo, he looks like he needs a condom pulled over his head), he short-circuited a movement to make sure that we had a world that was uncontaminated, and could provide the environmental services (clean air and water, for example) we need to survive. I view the idiocy of today's climate change deniers as a direct consequence of Reagan's denialism. You want safe food? Reagan and his followers want to declaw the FDA. And the list goes on and on.

So here's my counter-proposal: reissue the $100,000 bill, or better yet, initiate a $1,000,000 bill, and put Reagan's head on that. Those who have the wherewithal to acquire one of those bills can spend warm, sunny afternoons rubbing it on their nether regions.

And I'll never have to look at that moronic grin again.


Darius Whiteplume said...

I'd pay a million bucks to take a dump on that man's grave, and invite Faux News to cover the festivities.

I only truly hate so many people, but Ronnie gets two slots.

Anonymous said...