#ObscureGeoHazards

 This hashtag game occurred to me last night in the aftermath of a canvalanche...

• Canvalanche- when your pile of empties gets oversteepened, and collapses, sweeping everything in its path away
• Derbis fowl: 20 minutes of hurried writing, followed by an hour of exasperated editing.
• Hallar - volcanic debris flow in Appalachia
• Earthquack - disaster associated with enormous waterfowl.
• Tsugami- Japanese art form involving folding the ocean, often leading to nasty side effects.
• Volgina- source of queefs.
• Escrapment- danger from poop taken off a cliff falling onto passers-by below.
• Volcanic erection- geologist with blue balls.
• Kart topography- food vendors that distract and capture unwary pedestrians.
• Dessication fissures- piscivores in a drought.
• Creep- freaky dude who totally disrupts any foundation for belief in basic decency of humanity.
• Vulgarite- a really, really rude rock.
• Foold- disaster following an area's being inundated with idiots.
• Sizemic risk- consequence of too much rich, high-calorie consumption during Holiday season.
• Geophysical- damage to an area or region from a really awful Olivia Newton-John song.
• PailO'Seismology- earthquakes in a bucket! Fun for the whole family!
• Disorientation- the state of being somewhere other than central eastern Asia.
• Hoar frost- I'm not even gonna touch that one.
• Nuée aldente- an explosion of flavor as perfectly cooked pasta enters your mouth.
• Storm serge- results in large areas being drowned in fabric.
• Flash food- reactions between condiments and meal, with ensuing explosions and/or fireballs. Sriracha is often a factor.
• RT @theburntcity Gasperititis can be part of the Flash Food especially when dealing with unknown or unexpected flavors and textures.
• Liquifaction- the party that believes it should keeps its demands fluid.
• Trans-gendered faults- for heteros, the problems you have with your significant other.
• Induction Zones- military recruitment offices.
• Volganic- eruptions involving no artificial fertilizers or pesticides.
• Fissile- rock record of previously-existing life, mounted on a rocket, and armed with a nuclear weapon.
• Rock hammered- "Don't even ask. I've been drinking with geologists."
• Solar Wind- On occasion, the sun farts; if directed toward earth, can result in a geomagnetic stench.
• Rockfall- when outcrops shed their foliage to prepare for winter.
• Seiche- trying to pronounce complicated words when rock hammered.
• FEMA- actually not a hazard at all, it's the bone in the upper portion of the leg.
• Sinkholes- can collapse without warning, disrupting dish-washing plans.
• Fumaroles- Spanish for "papers to make cigarettes."
• Phreatic- atic is totally innocent!
• Focus- earthquakes happen when the planet loses this, and can't keep its shit together any longer.
• Lateral spread- associated with sizemic risk from overeating.
• Pummus- fossilized remains of Middle-Eastern chickpea spread. NOT edible. Trust me on this one.
• Magma- Clint Eastwood's preferred weapon in the "Dirty Harry" movies.
• Talker's block- frequently develops in response to volcanic eruptions in Iceland.
• "Talker's block" should not be confused with "speech impediment," which is responding to desert with stunned silence. 
• Tool envy- looking at your hammer, then at heavy machinery, sighing, "I want one." Will escalate to Death Star unchecked.